The Divorced Muslimah- Part 1

Assalamu’alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu

Dear readers,

I would like to introduce myself. I am one of the hundreds and thousands of divorced Muslimahs around the world.  I am also one of the many women you come across daily and think of as a successful, strong and ambitious woman or I am one of the women that you think of as pitiful, weak and miserable. We, divorced Muslimahs come in all shapes, sizes and made.  As a matter of fact, at this particular moment, one of us could be sitting right next to you. Beware or be aware!

You must be wondering what is all the fuss about divorced Muslim women. Well, that is the issue, there is no fuss, and maybe there should be. I will leave it for you to decide; I am not going to tell you my story about how I got divorced, nor the story of others like me, and how and why we are divorced. Let’s just say we all have our reasons and Allah is knower of all the reasons.

I am sure many of you ladies think that when a woman has her ‘talaq’ or divorce, this is the end of her story, of her torment, like a heroine in a novel, she has finally broken free of the shackles of the man who held her imprison. Truly, such is the case in many a situation, especially when domestic violence is involved. You can probably visualise her standing on top of a cliff, the breeze gently caressing her face, the wind twirling with her hijab, and her eyes are closed, she’s only contemplating this moment; the gentle caress of the wind on her face, the soft murmur of the waves breaking against the cliff and how amazing she feels right then, she has finally made it to safety and she’s awaiting a new beginning, one which actually end with ‘she lives happily ever after.’

SubhanAllah, isn’t that a beautiful depiction of a woman! A woman who stood for herself against the wrongdoer, against all odds; a woman who kept going even when there was nowhere to go. All this sounds really nice, but let’s trying zooming out the picture, let’s stand a bit further and see what else we can see. Here! Now, we get a better picture.

 Oh she’s right there on the cliff, wearing her black silky abaya, how shiny that looks! And her headscarf blowing on her face, blocking her view, she tries to move it away from her face but the wind keeps blowing it back. The wind is actually really strong that day, and she struggles to stay in place, she’s really on the edge of the cliff, and a wrong move could be quite fatal. It is starting to get dark; the sun is setting; she really shouldn’t be out that late, it’s maghrib time almost, she tries to move back, and a few pebbles fall off the cliff. She cannot see properly, darkness is falling, and her hijab would not stop smacking her in the face, she needs to see, to understand better where she’s going. She tries turning back, but suddenly she stops; where to go? She cannot go back, and there’s no way ahead of the cliff.

This is the story we are never told: The New beginning! Or is it?

This is the part of the story where you can join in and make a difference. Remember this is the story of a divorced Muslimah, but it could very well be the story of any lonely Muslimah; married, divorced, single etc.  With your permission, I would like to now include you in the story and give you a pivotal role in the new story of The Divorced Muslimah.

So, there she stands on the cliff, trying to fight the wind and her unrelenting hijab. She sees a bird flying towards her, and tries to dodge it; she quickly moves to her right but instead loses her balance and steps forward. It all happens in a split of second; she closes her eyes and reads her shahadah. Suddenly, something swiftly grabs her arm and spins her around.

“Are you ok?” asks a voice.

“Hmm Hmm,” she muffles.

She tries to regain control of the situation and finally manages to move her hijab away and looks up.

“You sure?” asks the same voice.

“Yes,” she answers softly.

Now, I don’t want to leave you in suspense anymore. You are surely wondering who that voice is, is it the hero? Or the prince in his shining armour coming to help a damsel in distress, you may ask. No, it isn’t any of that, remember this is a true story, and in true stories there’s no prince, but there’s Allah’s servants who He puts in your way to help you out. It was someone she hasn’t seen before, someone she hasn’t met before or even heard before. It was somebody who had been watching her from afar for a while, she didn’t notice that person before, but this person did notice her. Well, without further ado; this individual is: You!